Midlife Crisis - That's not me....Or is it?
Call it what you want - Midlife crisis, midlife challenge, midlife depression, midlife issues, midlife uncertainty, midlife malaise, midlife disaster, midlife dissatisfaction, midlife unhappiness, midlife emergency or midlife juncture.
Chances are if you are 40-65 you have had, are having or are getting close to your very own Midlife Crisis.
And whether you like the sound of it or not, it is inevitable that you will go through a significant transition during your midlife years. Yes, the Midlife Crisis is a transition phase in our lives, associated with our identity and self-confidence that often raises feelings of anxiety or disappointment.
For most the arrival of a midlife crisis is driven by
the thought that you perhaps haven't achieved your best
the realisation of your own mortality - that's right your closer to dying than you were before
the realisation that the things you always thought were important have not brought you the peace and happiness you thought they would
difficulty in balancing a life that has gotten way more complex than you planned it to be
If some or all of these things resonate with you then welcome to the masses, you aren't alone. A study on the relationship between unhappiness and age using data from six well-being data files on nearly ten million respondents across forty European countries and the United States showed that over half the adults over 50 years claim to have had symptoms of midlife unhappiness.
Markers of unhappiness that have been used in these larger studies include despair; anxiety; loneliness; sadness; strain, depression and bad nerves; phobias and panic; being downhearted; having restless sleep; losing confidence in oneself; not being able to overcome difficulties; being under strain; feeling a failure; feeling left out; feeling tense; thinking of yourself as a worthless person and failing to reach one's potential.
Most people between the ages of 45 - 54 experienced a significant decline in life satisfaction at some point with the average age where unhappiness peaks being 47.2 years.
The results of this study are shown below where age is plotted against happiness. It's simple and straight forward but out of it are two big questions
1. Why must we go through unhappiness (and a flood of other emotions) to reach happiness?
2. Who among us has the skills and strategies to come out the other side without leaving a train wreck of disaster behind?
Many people will reject the term midlife crisis. Mostly because rather than full blown crisis the symptoms can be anything from a constant drizzle of disappointment, a lack of balance and adaptation to our ever-growing list of responsibilities right through to deeper feelings of despair and un-fulfilment.
We observe six stages of a midlife crisis, called the The Many Faces of a Midlife Crisis. You can find out which stage you're in right now by downloading our FREE Midlife Pulse Check here.
The different stages range from pre mid life transition to post mid life transition, and highlight how the impacts can creep up on the unsuspecting and leave you really stuck without help.
The six stages are:
Midlife Cruising (Pre-midlife transition)
Midlife Cracks (Early signs of midlife transition)
Midlife Crunch (You are in full midlife transition)
Midlife Crisis (You have lost control of the midlife transition)
Midlife Coma (You are immobilised by the challenges)
Midlife Clarity (You have transformed and are set free)
Not everyone experiences all the stages but everyone will make it through. Having awareness of these stages and how to manage yourself during this transitionary phase of life will determine how long it goes for and how hard it hits. Regardless of what stage you are in, having a smoother ride through this transition needs you to move through emotional stages of denial, anger, resistance, withdrawal and acceptance to ultimately come out the other side re-purposed! The Midlife Pulse Check is perfect for insight into your current stage
Certainly, unhappiness and suffering in life brings a new perspective on feeling grateful and happy at what we have and perhaps this helps to answer the first question. Having said this does midlife suffering always lead back to happiness? Sadly for many the answer is no.
The take home message here is that the feelings many of us will experience in the midlife years are very normal. However the way we handle these feelings and the ability to navigate such a period is incredibly different in all of us. This leads us to question 2 about having the skills and strategies to come out the other side without a complete train wreck behind us. Most of us would like to avoid things such as divorce, depression, poor work life balance, poor relationships, health problems, fatigue, stress and anxiety.
Having the skills and strategies to thrive in the midlife years is very heavily dependent on having Purpose. Living with Purpose and living purposefully have been heavily researched with much written about the positive impacts on all aspects of life.
Only through the process of drawing a line in the sand, doing a download of your current story, unpacking yourself from several different angles and then creating your new story can you access the freedom, fulfilment, happiness and satisfaction in the middle years of your life that you deserve.
Our Powered By Purpose (PBP) does exactly this. It is a unique program specifically designed to help individuals navigate through the challenges of the Midlife years and out the other side to fulfilment, freedom and happiness.
Powered By Purpose pitches you as the author and the lead character in your story. We can't erase our past story but by re-writing your future story the Powered By Purpose program shows you how to;
rebuild your big dreams and realise them
live a full and meaningful life the way you designed it to be
take life to the next level
choose what you want in life and how to go and get it
A great way to get started knowing which part of the midlife transition you are in is to download our FREE Midlife Pulse Check.
Or get in touch with us at hello@purposeandflow.com.au
