Less is more - the secret to true happiness and fulfilment
Understanding where your midlife transition sits within the different life stages is a great way to help us navigate the inevitable midlife slump.
Much changes in our lives as we get older. We change physically, mentally and hormonally. Our beliefs, priorities and responsibilities change. By virtue of ageing, we gain wisdom, experience and knowledge.
Many of these changes however, depend on the person and the circumstances.
Somewhere amongst all of this change there’s a few things that we seem to be able to predict with reasonable certainty.
1. Childhood was simple
True happiness and fulfilment came from being loved, going on a family holiday, playing with your mates, climbing a tree or surfing at the beach.
Certainly, up to your teenage years you didn’t have much in the way of material possessions. You didn’t need much. Life was pretty straight forward. You were clear about why you were happy or sad and you were the eternal optimist. And fear? Well it never got in the way half as much as how it does now
2. Teenagers and Young Adults want stuff
The pursuit for material possessions ramps up. The latest iPhone, the $400 pair of shoes. Somehow society has created a commercial drive for us to want things. And want them now!
Urgency and necessity steer us around. We seem to measure our status heavily by our independence and how much we have or don’t have. The ego works over-time, the brain is addicted to the dopamine hits we get regularly and the whole process becomes almost unquenchable.
These patterns begin earlier and earlier in life and steadily things become more complex trying to feed that beast.
3. We become "Midlifers"
Our responsibilities have increased. We are perhaps parents, business owners, employees, mortgaged up, running high in debt and managing a family. We are grappling with midlife.
One side of the equation is telling us that we should continue to serve the ego and our societal status by getting more stuff. The other is telling us that this material stuff we have been focussing on for the past 20 years isn’t really doing the job in the way of real happiness and fulfilment.
Our time becomes more valuable because we have less opportunity to use it for our own happiness and joy. We are beginning to feel and wonder if a deeper sense of happiness and fulfilment comes from within ourselves yet we aren’t really sure how to access.
4. Older people know best
Eventually we realise that death is imminent and there are things other than material stuff that make us happy and fulfilled.
Unfortunately, this usually comes as a realisation when the fundamentals of life are steadily taken away. Things like our mobility, our health, our friends, our loved ones and indeed our own sense of identity.
We generally tame the ego and societal status doesn’t even get a look in. There are times where we may splash out on something material but it is driven by pure love or passion rather than ego and status.
Also, our sense of enjoyment around material possessions comes from knowing ourselves deeply and living more purposefully.
By subtraction of the noise and complexity out of our lives, we become abundant.
So what’s the point ?
As we grow and evolve and age, there is a scale from more extrinsic to more intrinsic drivers or happiness and fulfilment. From a complex, more material stage of life to a simple and less material stage.
At some point in your life, you will realise that fulfilment and happiness come from within
Why are we telling you this?
Knowing yourself, your gifts, passions, values, what drives you, motivates you and fulfils is applicable across any life stage but especially important for those of us in the midlife transition because of the battle you are in right now.
So what are your options?
Stick to our predictions above, go through a midlife slump and wait to get old before learning how to access true happiness and fulfilment
Get in touch with us to get on the road to opening yourself up, learning how to access your, gifts, passions and values and live out the remainder of your days with true abundance. Oh…and did we mention it’s ok to have the red Ferrari as well?
Reach out to us here if you are having problems being happy in your midlife years. We have the tools, and processes and know how to help you through anything.
Yours on purpose,
Ben & Josh (The Purpose & Flow team)